Running

A little over a year ago I started running. It was something I started doing as a way to increase my energy and get in shape.

About three months later, due to some life circumstances I became severly depressed. Not all at once though. It was something that got worse over time, hitting rock bottom in September 2005.

I kept running, though. I would run so fast, until I was so tired I had to stop. Tears streaming down my face, I would run for miles.

Along my running route was a catholic church. I would go in, the only person in the building, and sit down on the same bench I sat on the previous time. I was hot, sweaty, and exausted.

I had never actually attending a catholic church service. But, as I sat there I imagined a typical Sunday with the benches filled with people. Attending out of desire or obligation, with family or by themselves.

I have realized that I am no longer at the depth of depression hell. I have been liberated from whatever it was that was pulling me down.

If it wasn't for running, I think I would have wasted away. Those days when I used to sleep all day would have turned into weeks, and I wouldn't have cared.

I still run, though. But these days, I don't cry.